I want to apologize properly. Not just for what happened, although of course you deserve an apology for that, but for how I misjudged you. You've been very helpful, Shaun, and more than that you have been very understanding.
I am not asking you to do anything. I realize I have not dealt with this situation as well as I might have and I want to make certain you understand that I do appreciate how you have handled things. I thought once that you would have betrayed me as soon as a viable excuse to do so appeared. I should have understood sooner that I could trust you this much.
I admit I was concerned about how he would take it if you told him about these past few weeks. Of course he'll have to know that I was the one who hurt you. I understand that you cannot hide that much and I do respect your commitment to your order. But much of what I said to you, Shaun, I said in confidence, and especially with the way events are starting to play out here I am forced to admit that I am relieved I can do so.
*very slightly sharper* I do when I am forced to. *drumming fingers on one of those books* Don't make this any harder than it already is. I hate having to say this.
Of course he did. I was not sure if you had asked him to or not, but I guessed that you would at the very least be able to tell from what I said if it had indeed been a secret of his. Regardless, you are right and that is why...
It's a wonderful goal, one that Italy needed right then. Even if you've got the alterer motive of clearing your family's name from what history makes it out to be, or for that matter your purely egotistical goal of getting the masses to idolize you, the way you go about becoming that figure still results in something good for the people.
The problem is, I don't know if you can do it without it going wrong, at least the way you are now.
First, you've got to take into consideration how people feel, I mean look at what happened- well, back in the hospital. I'm just one person, but if you do that with an entire city state or someone with a bit of power, it could mean disaster for you. I've been saying this ever since that lovely truth conversation we had, but you never listen, I've got no idea if you'll even listen to me now.
Which is the second thing, you've got to learn how to listen to the people around you, even if they're saying things you don't want to hear. You always walk away or change the subject when it's something about you that you don't want to deal with, but sometimes that's something you should deal with, and if it's painful you've got to think about why that is. Some of it's going to be rubbish, especially from your enemies, but at least it'll tel you why they're your enemies and what you can do about it.
I've got to be honest, I can see things going either like how some of the historians paint you, which is a good leader but the fact that you use people eventually leads to your downfall, or you could end up like... well, him. If you want to change how things work out, you're going to need to change how you treat people... and for that matter how you look at yourself.
You always say that everyone's the same, yeah? But you've always got that air of superiority, even when you're trying to act humble. You make grand claims that you can do something, but how much of it have you manages to do? And how much of it is just what you expect that you can do? What's more, you hold everyone to a standard that even you haven't tried out for yourself.
For all your talk about equality, for the most part you think you're better than people around you, and we know.
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Shaun, I...
Thank you.
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*pause, slight irritated noise, going back to sorting through the books*
Never mind.
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Of course, anything else Cesare? I'm sure I haven't hit my quota of your daily disgust for every part of my being yet.
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I want to apologize properly. Not just for what happened, although of course you deserve an apology for that, but for how I misjudged you. You've been very helpful, Shaun, and more than that you have been very understanding.
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... What do you want? You can skip the part where you try and boost my confidence and just get to the bit where you ask me to do something.
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Listen, I can guess that Malik came by...
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Let me ask you something.
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It's a wonderful goal, one that Italy needed right then. Even if you've got the alterer motive of clearing your family's name from what history makes it out to be, or for that matter your purely egotistical goal of getting the masses to idolize you, the way you go about becoming that figure still results in something good for the people.
The problem is, I don't know if you can do it without it going wrong, at least the way you are now.
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Which is the second thing, you've got to learn how to listen to the people around you, even if they're saying things you don't want to hear. You always walk away or change the subject when it's something about you that you don't want to deal with, but sometimes that's something you should deal with, and if it's painful you've got to think about why that is. Some of it's going to be rubbish, especially from your enemies, but at least it'll tel you why they're your enemies and what you can do about it.
I've got to be honest, I can see things going either like how some of the historians paint you, which is a good leader but the fact that you use people eventually leads to your downfall, or you could end up like... well, him. If you want to change how things work out, you're going to need to change how you treat people... and for that matter how you look at yourself.
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For all your talk about equality, for the most part you think you're better than people around you, and we know.
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I don't think I'm better than everyone else. At least not to such an extent that I can stand on my own.
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